Gale Hawthorne is an Idiot
by seemaree
Summary: Gale has never been good at taking advice. That's why he is sure that if Katniss could see him now she'd be laughing at him.
1. Chapter 1

Apparently Peace Keepers now need aptitude testing and placement. They had never needed it before. Then again no one ever cared before if Peace Keepers were placed in positions that they were well suited for and maybe even liked.

Gale approved of the concept. A man or woman who was happy in their work was more likely to be an asset to the squad and the community. But the implementation left a lot to be desired.

He was the boss, and he was happy about it. So he saw no reason to take the stupid personality test, and sit through what was sure to be a long boring interview discussing his strengths and management style.

The higher ups seemed to disagree, and so he found himself 'setting a good example for the staff'. The test had been annoying, full of questions that seemed remarkably pointless, but at least it was done. Now all that was left was the interview. With the woman from the Capitol. Doctor of something or other, but she insisted everyone call her Diana.

Diana had charmed his entire department. Gale had been suspicious of her at first, but even he had to grudgingly admit that she was impossible to dislike. She genuinely seemed to want to help everyone find the best possible job for their particular skills and personality. Half the men seemed to be in love with her, but she never flirted with them. She was just nice. And kind. And it drove him crazy. He was not looking forward to this interview.

She smiled at him when he sat down. 'Gale Hawthorne. I have to tell you I was excited when I found out I was going to meet you.'

He is confused.

'Hero of the rebellion?'

He winces. He doesn't feel like a hero. He killed people. Including a lot of children and medics. Hardly something to be proud of. 'I hope what I did isn't going to count against me here.'

The smile immediately drops from her face. 'I'm sorry, I didn't mean to bring up bad memories.' She pauses. 'Well I want to reassure you that I have found you to be well placed in the job you are doing. You are an excellent leader and your staff like and respect you.'

Gale doesn't want to admit it but he is relieved. He relaxes a little as she goes on. Apparently she thinks that he needs an aide that challenges him more and is recommending that mouthy brat Anderson for the position. As annoying as it is he has to admit that the kid does have good ideas and he can see that bouncing ideas off her would help him. He agrees to the change and smiles a bit at how she will react to her sudden promotion.

They spend most of the interview time discussing the changes she would like to see implemented. He is impressed. He hadn't quite noticed the sharp intellect hidden behind the sweet charming exterior.

As the time passes he begins to realise he is actually enjoying talking to her, is attracted to her. He's not sure why, with her voluptuous figure and soft brown eyes she is nothing like the lean tough women he usually dates. But she reminds him of someone, he just can't place it.

He dismisses the idea from his head, even if he wanted to date her (and he is not so sure he does. She makes him nervous.) There is no point. It would be unethical while she is evaluating his team and as soon as she is done she will be going back to the capitol.

Gale is suprised then when he runs into her at a coffee shop a few weeks after her work is done. It turns out she is permanently assigned to the academy across town. That attraction is still niggling at him, so he hesitantly asks her to join him for coffee.

The feeling that she reminds him of someone keeps bothers him while they chat. It's not until he sees the flowers she has doodled on her napkin that it hits him. Freaking Peeta Mellark. She reminds him of annoying, bane of his existence Peeta Mellark.

He remembers the last time he saw the guy, it was the last time he saw Katniss too. He had given in to the urge to beg her to forgive him and give him one more chance. But when he got to 12 and knocked on her door the person who answered told him she didn't live there anymore. To try down the street. At Peeta Mellark's. He should have just quit right then but he had been stupid.

He wasn't sure what he was expecting when she saw him, but the look of pure shock on her face wasn't particularly gratifying. At least she didn't slam the door in his face. Peeta had of course come to the rescue, inviting him in, bringing tea and perfect little cookies. Then politely leaving them alone to talk. He remembered thinking,Okay the man is some sort of a pargon. Gale knew if the positions were reversed he would never have left Katniss alone with Peeta. And it wasn't even in a smug, confident she's mine kind of way. He saw the nervous little glance Peeta cut toward Katniss as he left the room.

Peeta had nothing to worry about. It seemed that Katniss' problem with him had nothing to do with what he had done in the war, and everything to do with Gale himself. Katniss had baldly stated that she just didn't love him, and never had, not the way he wanted, not the way she loved Peeta. If that hadn't hurt enough, she decided to follow it up with weird advice. He would never forget what she said.

'You and I are practically the same person Gale. We would never work. I need someone to balance me. I would never have been happy with you and I honestly don't think you would ever be happy with me.'

She had paused to squeeze his hand, as if to try to soften the blow. 'I want you to be happy. I think you need a Peeta in your own life. Promise me if you ever find yourself with a woman who reminds you of him you'll go for it.'

At the time he had dismissed the idea. The idea of trying to find a female version of Peeta seemed kind of creepy, although he had always thought the guy was a bit of a sissy, always talking about his feelings and frosting cakes. But dating female Peeta? It was just too weird. He had promised, and then spent the next ten years of his life dating Katniss Everdeen replacements.

As he looks across the table into Diana's sweet smiling face he has a feeling that somewhere Katniss is laughing at him. Right now he doesn't mind too much.


	2. Chapter 2

Dating Diana was stressful initially. He watched her closely and mentally listed every way that she was like and unlike Peeta Mellark. Was it creepy that he found something attractive about her if it also reminded him of Peeta? Was this whole relationship a weird parallel to his Katniss angst? He was driving himself crazy. He wasn't sure what he wanted or why he was doing this. But something kept him coming back. Diana was special in a way that had nothing to do with anyone but her own sweet self. And because of that being with her was different to any anything else he had ever had.

Every relationship Gale had ever been in consisted of fighting, making up, and inevitably the biggest fight of all culminating in the break up. He could almost write the script in advance. It was just how relationships worked. As the years past it became more tiring that exciting, to the point where he rarely bothered anymore.

It didn't go like that with Diana. It wasn't that they agreed on everything. Actually it felt like she disagreed with everything. But somehow she managed to do it without the screaming and without making him feel attacked. She just calmly presented an alternate opinion. At first he was paranoid that she was pulling some head doctor thing and manipulating him, but after a while he saw that it was just respect. She treated him with respect and expected the same in return.

Gale realised there hadn't been a lot of respect in his previous relationships. There hadn't been a lot of respect in his relationship with Katniss. It was a little embarrassing to look back on how he had acted. He had been so angry and trying so hard to hold on to her that he hadn't really cared about what she wanted.

Gale had thought he had put Katniss behind him years ago, when he accepted that it was never going to be. But it had been lurking in the back of his mind all this time. All along he had felt, deep down, that if things had been different, if Peeta Mellark had died in the games like he was supposed to, or if Katniss had just seen things more clearly, or if he never designed that trap bomb (oh that was one he revisted often) or if, if, if, then he and Katniss would be together and it would have been great between them right now.

But it wouldn't have been. It would have been just like every other bad relationship he'd ever had. Fights and then breaking up. Or even worse, because it was Katniss, and because of their history maybe they would just stay miserably together and keep fighting.

Gale kept very quiet about his past in 12. Most people didn't even know that he had personally known Katniss before the rebellion, and he liked it that way. He had no desire to feed the disturbing fascination with her that so many people still had. And he certainly didn't want to be forced to relive his own actions during the war.

So Diana was surprised when he finally got up the courage to tell her everything he had been thinking about himself, relationships, and Katniss. He wasn't sure what he had been expecting from her in response. Annoyance that he had been using her to work out his relationship issues perhaps? Jealousy that he had carried a torch for so long? He hadn't expected her to laugh at him.

He felt insulted.

Then she kissed him.

That was a bit better.

'I want to meet them.' Gale goggled a bit. He would never have pegged Diana as a Everlark groupie. 'I think you need the closure and I'm curious about these people who have apparently dominated your love life.' She clarified. Wow when you put it that way Gale sounded like the biggest groupie of all. How pathetic.

He had reluctantly agreed and now he was making the most awkward phone call ever. Nothing he rehearsed in his head sounded right,

'Hi Katniss, I know it's been ten years, but want to hang out next weekend?'

'Hey, I just want to tell you I'm finally over the creepy obsession with you. Can I see you soon?'

Yeah great.

Of course it went nothing like he planned.

'Hello?' Crap it was Peeta. Why hadn't he thought about him answering?

'Uh hi. Um I'm not sure if you remember me, this is Gale Hawthorne...'

'I know who you are Gale.' Silence. 'We haven't heard from you in a long time.' More silence. Gale couldn't seem to think of what to say. 'Is there a reason you called?' Peeta sighs heavily. 'I assume you called to talk to Katniss. I'll get her.'

Wow great job so far. Peeta probably thinks he's drunk. It's amazing that he's even willing to let Gale talk to Katniss. But then again he never has tried to stop her from seeing her old friend. Another reason why he hated the guy. Did he have be so gracious all the time?

'Hello? Gale is everything okay, the kids, and your mother...' Now his odd behaviour has made her think someone is dead. Could this get any worse?

'Hey Katniss. Everyone is fine. I just, um, I just wanted to know if I could come and see you guys soon.'

'Why? It's not, you're not trying to start something again are you?' Instant suspicion. It actually makes Gale smile a little.

'No! The opposite actually. I just, I've met someone, and I well I'm bringing her to see 12, and I wondered if we could see you too. Maybe take you and Peeta to dinner or something?' Gale was rather proud of that actually. Making it seem like the trip wasn't just to see her, and that he was totally cool with hanging out with Peeta Mellark.

The silence was long, and he was starting to wonder if she had just put the phone down and walked away.

'Okay. When will you be here?'

Dinner is awkward. Of course Peeta Mellark the showoff insisted on cooking dinner for them instead of allowing Gale to take them to a restaurant, well 'the restaurant' since there is still only one in 12. Gale feels like he's been one upped before he even sets foot in the house. To make it worse Peeta seems to feel no such thing.

After attempting to reminisce about their childhood but mostly tiptoeing around sensitive topics Gale and Katniss can't seem to find anything to say to each other.

Peeta and Diana don't seem to feel any tension, and take to each other like they are the old friends. They start by discussing Peeta's artwork, which is everywhere in the house, and move to Diana's work and finally land on cake decorating when Peeta serves dessert. They seem so natural and comfortable together, and find so many areas of overlapping interest they almost forget that other people are at the table with them.

Finally Peeta turns to Gale with a grin. 'Where did you get this woman? It's like I've found my long lost sister!' The comment makes Gale self conscious and he slouches down in his seat a little, glancing at Katniss out of the corner of his eye.

He sees a giant 'oh' of understanding form on her lips and then she starts laughing.

When Gale reddens and hunches more she laughs even harder. 'You finally listened didn't you, you stubborn old pig.' The others look confused so Katniss elaborates. 'Years ago I told him he needed to find a woman like Peeta, and it only took him ten years to listen.' The identical astonished looks that Peeta and Diana give each other are what set Gale off too. They laugh hysterically together and it finally feels like he's home again.

When they finally wind down Diana speaks up.

'Since the whole subject seems to be on the table, I do have one burning question.' She looks from Gale to Katniss and back to Gale again. 'What on earth made you two think that you could ever work as a couple?'

Peeta leans forward. 'I can answer that.' He smirks at Gale before turning to Diana. 'This probably comes as no surprise to you, since you are dating the man, but Gale Hawthorne is an idiot.'


End file.
